I am a reader of many types of literature—mysteries, romance, literary fiction, narrative non-fiction, poetry. For the past year, however, I have found myself reading less of the “serious” or “dark” fiction, and more of what seems to be light but not cozy mysteries. (I define a cozy mystery with a murder to solve, but very little violence is depicted. It can feature a knitting circle, a librarian or a bakery. And a cat, of course.) But the mysteries I’m recently drawn to typically include a murder of a man—often a sexual predator, a sleezy yet powerful man that has physically abused a younger woman. A man that has promised a relationship then dump the woman, ruin them socially or economically, then move on to another woman and repeat. And very often, the man was killed by a woman.

If you look at the book covers pictured here, you’ll see why I was drawn to them. They look “harmless” and promise humor. They each had a good dose of humor throughout, but that’s not what kept me reading or listening. It was the hope, that the women who killed the men, sometimes unintentionally, would get away with murder.

This is why we read fiction sometimes, isn’t it? We can root for the murderers and not be seen as monsters ourselves. We can exact revenge on all of the rapists, killers and wife beaters through the words of novelists. It gives us hope that if the justice system fails us once again, a different kind of justice will win in the end.

Misogyny is thriving in this current bizarro world we live in, so is it any wonder when a scene from “A Handmaid’s Tale” of women literally tearing a man apart with their bare hands is shown, it makes us jump up and cheer?

I remember watching “The Burning Bed” on television when I was 11 years old. I was in awe of Francine Hughes’ (played by Farrah Fawcett) bravery as she poured gasoline over her sleeping husband and set him and the house on fire. She had been abused by him for nearly a decade and she was finally getting away. At 11, I had already witnessed plenty of physical abuse in my home, but the abuse had ended by then. I remember feeling a little spooked by the movie, that could have happened in my family yet we were fortunate that it ended on a better note. But I couldn’t help but feel HAPPY that Francine got out. No matter what it took. Even at a young age I was happy that man was dead. He couldn’t hurt Francine ever again. (If you’re not aware, “The Burning Bed” was based on the real Francine Hughes. She won the court case against her with a plea of temporary insanity.)

After Luigi Mangione supposedly killed the CEO of United Healthcare, many people took to social media to praise Luigi’s actions. They too were sick of being fucked over by the insurance companies, of not having medical tests done because the insurance companies wouldn’t allow it (not the doctors, mind you, the insurance companies). People were dying because they were denied the medical care they needed. These people wanted to do exactly what Luigi had supposedly done. They wanted the CEO and his family to hurt as much as they had. But those that cheered Luigi on were also called “horrible” people because “there is never an excuse for murder.”

Is there?

After our family friend, Virginia Cookson, age 39, was murdered by her ex-boyfriend in September of 2024, I know there isn’t an excuse for her murder. None.

I can’t say the same for others.

Since the day Virginia was killed, I see victims of domestic abuse everywhere. Women in particular are being abused and killed by men that supposedly love them.

I want to tell you something, and I want you to listen to me. Being constantly watched and monitored is not love. Being strangled* is not being loved. Being hit, kicked or pushed is not being loved. Being humiliated or constantly made to feel guilt is also not being loved.

*Let’s get this straight–”choked” is when something that occurs internally, something is lodged in your throat. “Strangled” is caused externally, when someone is putting pressure on your throat that stops your breathing. THE MEDIA NEEDS TO CORRECT THEIR LANGUAGE.

Is it any wonder that I’m reading books with dead men in them and cheering on those that killed them? Is it any wonder I’m filled with rage when abusers of women are allowed to govern the country I live in, that the representatives we vote for allow more and more abusers and misogynists to help him take more of our rights away, and our children’s rights away?

Is it any wonder that sometimes I wish all the men were dead?

Friends, if anything I listed here is happening to you, there IS help. 1-800-799-7233 is the National Domestic Violence Hotline, or text BEGIN to 88788.