I’m a librarian. A good one. I’ve worked in libraries now for 28 years, and I wish I could tell you I got into this profession because I wanted to help people.

Nope!

I was on the cusp of getting my BFA in Creative Writing with a concentration in Poetry. I had no job prospects but to help manage the video store I had been working in since high school. What the fuck was I going to do? My job applications to Boston publishing houses went unanswered, and my few published poems were compensated with 2 free copies of each journal they were published in. I really liked food, so the starving artist route was one I was not willing to take.

In college, my work study job was at the library in the Circulation department. My boss had her Masters in Library Science and said I should pursue being a librarian. My first dumb ass thought was, “Sure! I like books and love to read!”

Egads. Whenever I hear this from potential librarians, I can’t help but cringe. Sure, a thirst for knowledge is a necessity, but if you don’t like people then please get the fuck out. (Yes, there are certain library positions that are not people-centric, but a majority are. Choose wisely.)

Anywho! I love what I do, but it’s become increasingly difficult to be positive about my work. Between book banning and budget cuts, it’s hard to keep your head up.

Then, our federal government went to the Dark side. Federal agencies have been decimated, including the Institute of Museum and Library Services (IMLS). State libraries receive federal funding, which is then doled out for various projects and services that impact all citizens, especially those in rural areas. The public library I work in is also an ARRC–Area Reference & Resource Center. We provide reference services and MANY items to small libraries via interlibrary loan. Their small budgets can not handle the many requests folks ask for. So, as an ARRC, we do receive some of that federal funding to assist us in being an ARRC–not a lot of money, but some. We will only receive half this year and probably nothing after that. We assume IMLS will cease to exist under this new regime/administration.

Why am I telling you this? Bear with me. I’m getting there!

Last week, I started listening to the book The Measure. It’s about a world where every adult over the age of 22 receives a box with a string in it. The string represents how long each person will live. Short stringers go to group therapy, couples break up, the government makes all active military personnel show their strings, and on and on. The story has sucked me in, and it brings up a variety of ethical questions.

So when I went to work yesterday, I had been listening to this story on the way in. Then, I sat in a meeting where we discussed the loss of those federal funds I mentioned earlier.

For just a moment, I had actually forgotten I lived in a world that I’m not fond of. I was still in that world of mystery boxes filled with strings, of knowing how long you had to live, of people making the best of the time they had left. Of course, there’s a nasty politician in the story trying to force people to reveal their string because he’s a power-hungry dick but whatever! It’s fiction!

*sigh*

Yeah.

Reality is kinda terrible.

But friends? Please keep fighting. Please keep speaking out and keep informed. Those protests last weekend warmed my heart! Keep loving and protecting those that need you. You are making my reality worth living. So thank you.

And if you can?  Go read a good book. Something that helps you escape for a bit, perhaps? Don’t worry about what others think about it. Whether it’s a vampire romance or a murder mystery. Read what makes you happy.

Hugs to y’all. 💜