Letting go

After 11 weeks of Monday morning weigh-ins, with at least 3 of the last weeks being very pissed off at the scale, I finally achieved my goal weight…on a Monday!!  Typically, I weigh myself 3….ok, 5 times a week.  Obsess much?

For the past few weeks, I’ve been at goal weight on Thursday and Friday, but never, ever on Monday.   Yet, this morning, at 4am, my back was hurting so I figured I might as well get up.  I dragged the scale out from beneath my bureau, trying not to wake anyone.  I gingerly touched the center of the scale with my toe, waiting for the 4 zeros to appear.  I held my breath, stepped on and…..164.5.  A half pound less than my goal weight.  Yay!  While my family slept, I threw my arms up and gave myself a silent cheer.

brassring

Is this arduous journey now over?  Can I stop  obsessing about every calorie I inhale or refuse?   *Will* I stop obsessing?

I hope so. I know my friends and family hope so.  If you’ve ever worked towards a particular goal for a long period of time (training for a marathon, losing weight, etc.) you know that once you achieve that goal, it’s sometimes hard to let it go.  To let the process go.  To change your habits into just running for fun and exercise, or to eat what you want while maintaining your weight.   Your goal no longer needs to consume you.

It’s time to let it go.

I’ll be the first to admit that I suck at this.  I think I have a good network of very supportive folks who will help me, who will remind me that it’s ok. You can eat that one tootsie roll, and it won’t matter.   You really don’t need to know the calories of EVERYTHING.  But if you start to freak out, if you feel like you just have to know how many calories you just burned walking to the post office and back, your people will help you.  They’ll talk you down from this ledge you’ve found yourself on.   They will help pry your fingers from this infatuation and release it.

They will help you let it all go.  YOU will help ME let it go.

So…..here I go.

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One thought on “Letting go

  1. Pingback: Meet my nemesis | See Holly Run

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